Action Tracey New Year!

Every year at about this time I start getting excited a new year is just hours away and in some places the world is already new. It's a turning and a chance to be new, to be who you might have been last year. On my birthday, which occurs only days before the new year I set a personal new birthday year resolution, this year it is to write in my journal every day, unfortunately I have got out of the habit, which is strange for me considering that I've written in a journal consistently since the 3rd grade. So there is my birthday resolution. Now for the New Years resolution of 2010, I have two and they are good ones. One I'm not going to tell you about but it could be one of the best ideas I've ever had, the other one is to practice yoga every day. I don't remember what my resolution was last year, I know I had one but at the moment it escapes me. This is going to be the year though. I really will be more of the person I have expected myself to be. Now everyone out there with a resolution, it is sure to fail without a plan. So here is my plan . . . I'm going to wake up an hour before I have to, every day and practice yoga. I've got a calender to check my progress and I'll post occasionally on a topic. My reason for this is I am very happy when I do yoga and I act better all around, plus sometimes I can be so lazy that I don't do things that I really enjoy. No more, this year I'm going to be an action Tracey. Merry Happy New Year to all!

The Itching Belonging Niche

Is it really possible that almost 4 years after graduating high school I still feel like I have no idea what to do with myself?
Here is a list of things I think would be worth while
1. Writing
2. Teaching
3. Working in the special collections of a major academic library
4. Photography
5. Editing books (not just copy editing but picking the books that are to be published)
6. Editing or writing for YOGA JOURNAL magazine
7. teaching yoga

It always seems like the success stories come from people who have found their niche in the world, or a place where they belong. Everyone one wants that. I want to find something I that makes me feel good, something that makes me feel like I belong here. But none of us really belong here. So to all those people who feel like they don't belong and can't seem to find their niche, you may be better off than those success stories, and if not then at least you aren't alone.

Not Sleeping

Of all the monotonous routines of our lives, I think going to sleep and waking up are my most favorite. I love sleep, I can't get enough of it. It is wonderful isn't it? I love snuggling in the blankets, forgetting my cares and worries and the dreams, wow. Last night I went to London and got lost on Durry Lane. I love waking up half an hour before I have to wake up just to contemplate how wonderful it is to sleep. The next best part is when this really swell guy calls every morning and says sweet things to me or curses the horrible cell phone coverage. So the time honored and all together necessary routine of sleeping and waking for me doesn't seem so monotonous. I actually enjoy it, except I haven't slept tonight. I know. Take a look at when the blog is getting posted, 6:30 am is for sleeping! Why can't I sleep? I'm going to miss the whole experience of sleeping and dreaming and waking. Not today, not for me, I miss out. I have a final in an hour and a half, at least I'll be awake and alert. Is there a medical condition for people who don't sleep yet feel no signs of tiredness? I mean I have to get tired sometime and when I do, I'll be waiting!

My Lonely Journal

This was supposed to be the year of the marvelous journal. I went to London this year. I'm dating the most wonderful man I could possibly ask for. Is everything just too good to write about? Can I only write when I feel wronged or hurt? Is 2009 too much of a perfect year to have anything to say? I feel horrible about my journal and I am seeking refuge in my blog, who can't possibly love me as much as my journal. Journal and I have been together consistently since I was 13, I only met you, blog, in London and this is scarcely my third or is it my forth entry. While I contemplate whether or not Journal will take me back I will take solace in trace Trafalgar's Tablet, which like my dear Journal no one reads.

Peter Pan

   Today before I sat down to write this post I looked out the window and thought I saw the image of Peter Pan in the clouds.  For a moment London transformed, it wasn't busy city with a dirty, unfriendly underground.  It was a city full of the magic of Peter Pan.  If I were a younger child I would quietly suspect he was some where around the city and hold with a firm unspoken confidence that perhaps tonight he might come and teach me to fly to Neverland.  

One thing I've always wanted to do is visit that statue in Kensington Garden, and on May 1, 2009, I did that,  97 years after it was placed there, to the day.  There was a magic in the exactness of the dates and I reflected on the 97 years that statue has stood there in the place the book claims Peter landed. I've looked for 1st editions of the book and I've found a few, but 

none that I could afford.  I don't know what it is in the book of Peter Pan, or the 

story, or the 

statue that turn the gears of magic

 in the mind.  I guess Peter reminds us that while we may have to grow old he always gives us the opportunity to refuse to grow up.  

   

The First Week

My internet has been down, but its up now so I'm writing.  London has been great so far.  I've been lost, almost run over, stared down in an elevator, to the Banqueting House, to the Museum of London, and to see Peter Pan's statue.  I can hardly think of everything I've done so far so I'll just start with today . . . 

  Today was super fabulous.  After waking up and taking to Richard (he was just going to bed, tee hee)  I went to class and discovered it was a lot more easier to take notes with my laptop in professor Fielding's class.  I love the organization of the lectures.  Of course there is the Shakespeare class with Professor Larsen too.  I like that class and feel more in my element even if I don't sing praises to Shakespeare with the rest of the class.  It's not that I don't like Shakespeare, but it almost ruins it for me that every one else likes him so much.  I did my laundry (I should have brought more pants) and finished my Romeo and Juliet response paper.

I went for a walk and bought a pillow and some shampoo.  I took myself out to eat at French Cafe.  It was nice sitting at the window and writing in my journal.  I'm trying to feel more like I'm in London, I hope I feel like I am soon.  I need to go see some things I'm really interested in, that just might do it.  Sorry this first post is lame, the next will be better . . . perhaps